I've grown so used to living without chivalry, that when I experience it, it just makes my day!!!
My dad, grandfathers and brothers have always been shining stars in my mind when it comes to chivalry. The thing is that as I've gotten older, moved from home and haven't spent as much time with them, I've had to "readjust" myself in a sense as far as expectations from men in this society.
In my sociology class (which I love), we've been discussing all semester about moving from traditional society to modernity. With modernity comes the importance of "self" and with the importance of "self" comes the lack of importance for others. I've had my eyes opened to how DRASTICALLY morals and ethics are becoming less apparent in today's society.
Today starting when I got to work, I had TWO instances of chivalry and just plain politeness. :) First of all, I went to get a candybar for my co-worker and I to share, and they had a special on their giant candybars for just $.99. I had only brought a $1 bill, so I didn't have the tax for it, and the two people on either side of me insisted on giving me a dime for the tax. They were fighting over who could serve me by giving me the extra $. It was so darn nice!
THEN, I went to grab dinner in the hospital cafeteria, (I only had about 10 minutes so I ate fast-- sitting by myself) and an older gentleman around the age of 80 came up to me and said, "How are you doing over here all by yourself, sweetheart?" So sweet. Then I ran into him again as I was walking down the hall to get on the elevator. I was about 25 feet away from the elevator, and even though the door to the elevator was closing, he reopened it for me. He was a gem!
These two instances tonight were wonderful. The first instance were two younger people who helped me, whereas the second instance was an older man. It was like God was showing me that yes, the "generation of chivalry" is dying out, but that there still was some chivalry left in the world. He gave me an instance of both, to give me a glimmer of hope.
Sorry modernity, but you haven't COMPLETELY rid of chivalry. :-)
2 comments:
It makes me really happy that you are taking a sociology class! I think they are so important to take. I've actually become a sociology major. It's kickin!
Sometimes, especially when a woman does not grow up with chivalry as an active part of her training - it can be a difficult thing to accept. It has continued to be a growing process for me since I was raised w/o brothers and grew up working on my parents farm. Most of the time I was expected to pull my own weight w/o help.
Paul J once told me that it is encouraging to men when women allow/ask them to help. God has given me many opportunities to humble myself and put that advice into practice at work since part of my job is to carry computer equipment.
It seems to take a little bit more for me to ask for help with my household tasks, mostly because of my own pride. What I really need to remember is something I learned the first time I remember being reproved after starting to attend SCC: A dear friend/brother reproved me for not allowing him to change the headlight in my car. He told me that it wasn't because he didn't think I could do it, he knew I could. It was because he wanted to love & serve me as his sister/friend. How could I argue with that? I handed him the screwdriver and let him finish changing the headlight. I love him for confronting me.
Sometimes I look for opportunities to allow men to be chivalrous and other times I lose the blessing of allowing others to serve me/serve with me because of my pride. This can still be a very challenging area for me but I am still growing.
-wendy sue
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